If you’ve ever wondered if opposites truly do attract, my husband and I are living proof. We are as opposite as they come!
He’s an extrovert. I’m an introvert.
He’s gregarious and funny. I’m quiet and matter-of-fact.
He’s a “feelings” person. I’m a thinker.
He relies on his intuition. I rely on logic.
He’s never met a stranger. I get overwhelmed in groups of people I don’t know.
While we knew when we were dating that we were different, after we married it quickly became apparent that these differences could very easily drive us apart. It seemed with each decision that arose we just did not see eye to eye.
My structured, controlling nature collided with his free-spirited, fly-by-the-seat-of-his-pants nature on a regular basis. Our perspectives were so different!
As we navigated challenging situations in our early years of marriage including job loss, mounting debt, medical problems, church planting, relationship conflicts, the miscarriage of our first baby, and more, I struggled to trust God in both the day-to-day and in the larger narrative of our lives.
My husband’s faith, however, seemed to only grow stronger as a result of the same challenges that left me feeling like our lives were spinning completely out of control.
One night nine years into our marriage, some friends blessed us with a date night and free childcare for the evening.
It had been a challenging season as we had recently made the decision for my husband to come off the staff of the church we helped plant several years prior and start attending a smaller, newer church plant closer to our home. Also, just five months prior to our date night, he had started a pastoral life coaching practice, adding “small business owner” to the list of new roles in our lives.
All the changes in our relationships, responsibilities, and finances taxed my stability seeking personality, and let’s be honest, my faith too.
After enjoying a scrumptious meal and quality kid-free conversation on our date night, we started the 40 minute drive home. Previously light conversation turned heavy when my husband said, “I have something important to tell you.”
The discussion that followed included him explaining that he’d been praying about his business and felt God’s leading to offer all of his pastoral life coaching services for free for an undetermined period of time. I was stunned. To me, this represented complete lack of financial security and a hefty dose of “the unknown.”
But instead of pushing back with a laundry list of reasons why I thought that was a bad idea, somehow, through God’s grace, I answered, “Okay, I don’t understand, but I trust you.”
It was a simple statement to say, yet a difficult one to put into practice.
I’ve learned the same is true with my trust in God. It’s simple for me to say, “Yes Lord, I trust You.” But more often than not, my bold statement of faith results in a Peter moment. I trust God enough to step out of the boat, but then I doubt Him in the details and I start to sink.
In the past three years since that conversation, we’ve witnessed countless examples of God working in the lives of my husband’s life coaching clients and in our own lives. I’m learning to trust God as our provider, and I try not to dwell on the details of how it’s going to happen.
Blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence.
As with everything in life, growing in this area is a process. When I start to feel myself wanting to know and control all the details in a situation, I’m learning to instead to meditate on God’s truths and promises.
Here’s one I’ve committed to memory:
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
When I start to worry and fret about the details of my life, I’m training my mind to instead focus on truth.
If you too struggle to release control of your life and trust God with both the big decisions and the details, you’re not alone. We’re fellow travelers on this journey!
I encourage you to dig deep into God’s word and hold onto the truths and promises He’s given us each day. And may you also experience God’s deepest peace.
LeeAnn Taylor is a maker of memories & believes perspective is everything. A wife to Chuck & a working mom to 3 spunky kiddos, she’s on a journey of releasing fear, growing in faith, and embracing the freedom Christ came to offer. LeeAnn writes at Embracing the Mosaic Life, where she fosters a community seeking to parent with purpose and trust their broken pieces to the Ultimate Artist. You can connect with LeeAnn on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.
This is the 34th post in Testimony Tuesday: Women who inspire. Click HERE to read all of the other posts in this series. Now it’s your turn to link up your story of how God is working in your life. ________________________________________________________________________________________
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